Tip: No to Yes
A coaching tip for everyday magic
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Coaching is goal-oriented, but sometimes it can be tough to know what you want. One way to get clearer on your own desires is to make use of the brain’s tendency to think in binaries. Start with what you don’t want, and then imagine what you might want instead. No to yes.
Things that you don’t want are often more obvious because of negativity bias, and because negative feelings are inherently uncomfortable and tend to make themselves known in the body. A no is generally anything you consistently complain about or find chronically irritating. It can be anything that makes you feel tired or drained or tense or angry. Not all negative feelings are indicators of a desired change, but they are a good place to start your inner detective work!
Also, importantly, there are always many possible yes’s to a single no. Given the same situation (say, a heavy workload), ten people might imagine 10 distinct yet equally satisfying yes’s, or ways to change that situation. Your “no to yes” conversion will likely be unique to you and could be surprisingly different from someone else’s.
Journaling prompts to move from no to yes:
Instead of _________, I would like _________
What I’d really like to be doing LESS of is _________
What I’d really love to be doing MORE of is _________
I’m ready to STOP _________
I’m ready to START _________
My biggest complaint is _________
My greatest wish is ___________
If you’d like to learn more about how coaching can help identify what you really want, or if you would like support with a personal or professional challenge, please reach out for a private consultation.
